Homesick

Sometimes, I watch Gossip Girl just to view those shots over looking the city at the beginning of every other scene.

And I'm reminded of why I love New York.

Reminded of that feeling I had the first time I stepped off of a train platform in Grand Central Station.

It was no longer a dream.

I was no longer that little girl who kept a stamp of Lady Liberty next to a New York state quarter and a candle that said, "New York City" on it in a shimmery pink glitter. That little girl who dreamed about "the big city."

The orange lighting. the people. my new subway map. dragging my suitcase on the pavement through Chelsea. that moment when I thought to myself this is home.


I go back to that moment every chance I get.

It was the day after Thanksgiving and I was only seventeen-years-old.

Sometimes, that day feels so far away.

Then, I remind myself, I'm still so young. I still have plenty of time to make it my home.

Heartaches

Give me long enough and I'll talk myself out of everything I consider.

All I want is Manhattan.

If that's all I ever have in this life, I will be happy.

Well, that and a Kitchen Aid.

So, even though I want him.

Even though I want Seattle.

Even though I want a job in Denver.

Even though I want to stay here.

I can't.

My heart breaks for Manhattan.

Manhattan and a Kitchen Aid.

A shiny, red Kitchen Aid.

Tears

The craziest things make me cry.

Like how I went from reading this blog post,

which led me to this website,

which made me start thinking about how I would love to eat delicious vegan food in New York,

and then...

I began crying over how much I miss New York.

I didn't know you could miss something or someplace so much until I went to Manhattan.